Archived Newsletters - FEEL THE JOY OF PLAYING GOLF IN YOUR HEART :
Newsletter February 2015
February is the month of love. The feeling of love comes from your heart. The feeling of hitting a perfect golf shot resonates in your heart. Discounting that feeling by judging the result keeps you in your thinking mind.
Love is a state of peace inside and out where you are focused in the moment. There is no worry, fear, doubt, indecision, humiliation, feelings of self-doubt, unworthiness, inferiority or superiority. Any impulse to aggressively control your game will move you into these feelings of self-judgment.
One of the mental keys for successful golf is to let go of self-judgment. When you think about how you are doing, or how to do it, you are judging yourself and your performance under the guise of helping your game. When you judge yourself you are likely to feel anxious, guilty, embarrassed or angry. These feelings will ultimately sabotage your golf game, lower your self esteem and keep you from being successful.
Let go of judgment
Judgment is the comparison between how something seems and how we think it should be. We would like to believe that we could hit every golf shot perfectly. And when we don't do that, we feel frustrated, embarrassed and humiliated, and reject ourselves because we feel inadequate. And so we pretend to be what we think we should be (the perfect golfer) by demeaning ourselves with words or physical actions of disgust. In other words, we pretend to be what we are not (perfect), because we are afraid someone else will notice that we are not what we pretend to be.
The way we judge ourselves is the strongest Judge there is. When we miss a shot in front of other people, we try to deny the mistake and take off the attention by covering it up with excuses and rationalizing why it happened. To be a champion golfer, you need to seek your own approval, not the approval of others.
To maintain our balance and composure it is necessary to look at the game of golf/life in a different perspective. We need to forgive ourselves for being human, for making mistakes. This is the answer to Judgment. It requires a change of attitude and a new belief system. Golf is management of imperfection. Each shot is a story. When it is over, you begin a new story. Instead of blaming yourself for your mistakes, learn from them so you won't repeat them. When we are "in the zone" and playing at our peak performance level we are not learning----- just enjoying the experience.
Become an alchemist! Use your thoughts and words and pictures to create the life and golf game that you desire. Let go of judgments that sabotage your game and put you into an internally self-created prison. Give yourself permission to enjoy the game of golf with its ups and downs, with its perfect shots and imperfect shots, with its humiliating situations and its joyous moments! Remember that golf is a game where an inch can make the difference between total disaster and absolute perfection! See the round in its entirety. Don't be trapped by a few miss-hits into judging your whole performance by them. Reinforce and enjoy the good shots.
Affirm your worthiness
Peak performing athletes rarely put themselves down. They talk to themselves positively about what they are attempting to create. They change past negative messages that come up into positive empowering ones. This is a part of their mental training program. They repeat positive mental affirmations and training routines until they are wired into their brains, body and spirit and become a conditioned response.
You are your most important critic. Nothing is more critical than the opinion you have of yourself. What you say to yourself in your inner mind is the most important conversation you will ever have. You become confident by affirming yourself.
Keep doing your best. If you always do your best, there is no way the Judge within can find you guilty or blame you. When you give it your best effort, you learn to accept yourself. Practice, learn from your mistakes and look honestly at the results. This increases your awareness of your Self.
Focus on the good that you want to create in your golf game and more good will come to you. This is the Universal Law of “like attracts like.” Be your own best coach. Encourage and treat yourself as well as you do the others in your foursome. Let go of all your unreal self assessments in which you find yourself in any way inadequate that comes from never measuring up to being perfect. Accept and love yourself more than anyone ever loved you.
Golf is a game in which you have to play your mistakes. Learn to forgive yourself for your imperfection of being human. Instead, congratulate yourself for what you did well during the round of golf. Gratitude is the answer to forgiveness. You probably made fewer mistakes than you thought.
Love playing the game of golf more than you love the outcome.
Play”In the Zone” With Joan
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