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Newsletter July 2024


In last month's PMI June 2024 newsletter, I explained why we haven't been able to achieve the success we know we are capable of in our adult years. I had a big response from golfers who related their lives to this article. This month I would like to explain further why childhood programming is still controlling your lack of success, and the steps to change what is not working for you.

When you were told in your formative years that you weren't good enough, it didn't feel good. So, you covered it up or repressed it so you wouldn't feel like that again. That is the core issue that is still running in your subconscious mind. On the golf course it surfaces as the feeling of fear of not being able to accomplish what you desire. To achieve success, you need to get to the core issue when this feeling of unworthiness comes up.

As a child no one listened to you. And they did things to you that you may not have had control over. As a little child you developed strategies so you could be accepted. You may be an adult now and still working from that survival imprint that will come through and surface into your physical performance.

The Inner Child is the part of you that holds your memories, that feels your feelings. Without your awareness it may be calling the shots in your decision-making. Working with this part of yourself is a way of examining the source of your choices and evaluating whether they are coming from outdated, unexamined beliefs that are not delivering the best quality of life for you. You can now replace those old self-sabotaging beliefs with new self-affirming beliefs.

Thinking vs. Feeling

Feelings allow you to know yourself. Feelings that trigger you in golf are fear, blame, shame, anger, guilt. Essentially it is any feeling that diminishes your self-worth. When we feel these feelings, and act on them, we lose our personal power. As golfers we blame ourselves (or others) for missed shots, or putts that we thought we should make. No one makes you feel that embarrassment or shame. It is already inside you.

The first time you hit a perfect golf shot you experienced a heartfelt feeling inside you of exhilaration, an overflow of happiness. it was so powerful that you wanted to do it again and again. Thus began the pursuit of perfection in the game of golf. 

The difference is between thinking and feeling. Golf is an inner game. It is an inner search for Self. Golf will teach you who you are through your feelings. That is where the inspiration is - in your heart. It is the driving force to discover loving yourself enough to enjoy every shot and every opportunity to create that wonderful feeling. You have had this power all along, but you listened to another way and were distracted from your inner knowing.

What is keeping you from achieving that blissful feeling? Somewhere along the way of learning to play golf, you were distracted from the happy, fun emotions that made you feel good. They were replaced with thoughts of what to do, how to do it, and fears of not obtaining what you want. Your mental ego took over and your mind became centered on constantly learning all the mechanics of the swing in the hope that a perfect swing would give you success. Instead, you became anxious about your scores and fearful of the golf course. Because of our beliefs we are unaware of the hidden beliefs we have been thinking for 40-50 years that are controlling us.

What do we need to do to change this old childhood programming?

Steps to remove negative limiting core beliefs

 1.       Be aware that what annoys you is an old pattern that keeps coming up over and over. I don't need it anymore.

2.       The emotional belief must be changed. Be willing to let go of the programming. Don't give the situation your power. I don't need to feel this way anymore.

3.       Love yourself for your individuality. It's okay to be different. We are all different.

4.       Let the old patterns go that don't allow you to be who you are. There is nothing more I want to feel about this (failure) experience.

5.       Forgive yourself for keeping the programming going. To forgive is to let go. I do not desire to have this feeling, this pattern, this (self-sabotaging) experience ever again.

6.       Forgive everyone else who wanted you to be that way. This wipes the slate clean. I won't let them have my power anymore.

7.       Create a new loving program of yourself using feelings from your heart. I love, trust, have fun with my golf game.

8.       Reinforce the new program daily.

To forgive is to let go

Forgiveness is about the feeling in your process for things to be different. Forgiveness is how to remove the feeling of low self-worth or powerlessness. That is an old picture of your life, but for some reason it is still in your unconscious. Like your computer, it will keep in running until you delete it and change the programming. First, you must let the unworthiness belief go to give you a clean space to put in a new self-affirming program. Once you have forgiven yourself, you must forgive everybody else who wanted you to be that way. Don't let them have your power anymore. And don't give the situation your power. It's all your own creative power.

Know that whatever feelings you produce are created by you from your experiences. What produced the feeling? Is it yours? Or is it something you believe that is constantly promoted by society. Is competition to be the best feeding your ego or is it false programming to prove to the outer world that you are something you are not. Anytime you can think in terms of not being, you are feeding the ego as a defense mechanism to protect yourself. The child has to be taught to cover up their feelings of joy, self-worth, and being their true self to adapt to the rules laid down by society and the authority figures in their life Is there any difference between a mother yelling at her child in a grocery store to stop crying (because she is embarrassed) or you getting angry at yourself for missing a shot. In either case, the basic needs for love are not met.

To be successful at golf and life you need to have your mind, body and spirit in balance. When you are in the zone, that is what is occurring. You have allowed your mind energy to move into a higher state of energy known as the heart's love energy. Love energy produces the euphoric feeling of what we call the zone state of being. What keeps you from being in this state is not allowing your mind to let go of all the rules and programming that have conditioned your behavior up to this point. Allow yourself to feel. Let go of the competitive need to win and just enjoy the experience. We all know we play at our peak performance level when we are in the zone state. Why keep yourself from this enjoyment? 

Trust Your Intuition

Intuition is a feeling that comes from your heart when you know the answer without conscious reasoning. It is the sudden alignment of neural pathways. It is what you feel or sense in your gut. Intuition is when you are guided by a feeling instead of overthinking or overanalyzing. Trust and believing in your intuition, your gut sense, will transform your game.

You were born with intuition. You don't have to think about how you know, you just know. It is estimated that 90 percent of percent of people overthink their decisions. Think of what that means for all the decisions you are making during a round of golf. Using your intuition can keep you from making all kinds of mental errors.  

You have the ability to sense/feel your intuitive knowing before consciously thinking. Trusting your intuition is one of the most important things you can do while playing the game of golf.

Make peace with yourself. Use your intuition to trust yourself as all different aspects of the game change. Everything is simplified into now, and now is the only thing we need to trust.

Play "in the zone" with Joan

Entrain Your Heart & Mind for Peak Performances 

One-on-one coaching: Call +1-828.707.5478, or contact Joan by email pmi4@bellsouth.net for a free consultation to learn about mental golf in person, or worldwide by phone. Learn what is missing in your game so you can achieve your peak performances.

Please share this monthly mental instruction newsletter if it has been helpful to you. Forward it to your friends so they can have more fun playing the game of golf while lowering their scores. Link to www.pmi4.com to download previous PMI mental golf newsletters from 1999-2024 on the Archived Newsletter page https://cutt.ly/kwMY2jXt  

To train your brain for improving and trusting your short game, listen to the Positive Mental Imagery self-empowering guided imagery self-hypnosis CDs/MP3s in the privacy of your own home. Eight different empowerment audios are available at www.pmi4.com/cart

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"THE HEART OF GOLF, Access Your Supreme Intelligence for Peak Performances" explores and explains negative emotions such as fear and performance anxiety, the four Cs of mind blockage, the four progressive stages of learning the supreme intelligence of the heart, and the way to access the zone in competition. It is a player's guide for developing your true inner self by returning to the joy and love of self instead of seeking praise and rewards from the outside world. This guidebook for transforming your life and golf game is available at https://amzn.to/3jEMVuv   All royalties will be donated to junior golf.

 

 

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